The Daily Spam Report 1/21: Another dead relative found

Hong_Kong_Symphony_of_LightI realized this morning that I have failed to update you on my correspondence with Mrs. Supini Thrunkul, the woman who apparently wants to help me get access to the Chinese bank account of my long-lost, never-known, genealogically-unconnected dead relative, Dr. Dietrich Schrager.

After much back and forth, including with her banker, Skunk Moon, they grew frustrated with my reluctance to open up any forms they sent me. I had resolved from the get-go that I would not open up any links they emailed nor would I lie.

Mrs. Thrunkul ended our conversation by writing, “I think, I have to stop also communicating with you. I will have to look for another person to do this for me OK. Thanks for all your effort so far. Bye.”

It’s taken me a while to get over the rejection (Editor’s note: I typed that with a snicker) and I do wonder how they’ll find another relative of Dr. Dietrich Schrager since my sisters are not nearly as interested in playing along with something like this as I am.

Into this void comes the below email I received last weekend. Apparently, I have another dead relative in Asia, this one in Hong Kong. I must consult with my cousin who is the genealogist in our family as I had no idea our Eastern European roots apparently took hold in Asia (Editor’s note: More snark/sarcasm).

This email comes from Mrs. Ala Melkumyan at Tai Yau Bank. Why would an employee from one of the biggest banks in the commercial metropolis that is Hong Kong send me an email from a gmail account if it was on the up and up?

Wouldn’t happen. You know it. I know it. The American people know it.

Please don’t fall for this.

If you have an email you want to warn your neighbors about, email it to me at: and then, just hit delete.

Take care,


From: []
Sent: Sunday, January 19, 2014 12:57 PM
To: Adam Schrager
Subject: Re:


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Compliments and good day to you and your family.

I write you this mail as a reminder once more having waited patiently for your response to my initial contact with you through snail mail.

However since I assume you did not get it I want to use this medium even though it might not be the best form of communication in matters like this due to the ever growing disbelief and illicit scams and fraud associated with it, I seem to have no choice than to make use of it, coupled with the fact that it might be just perfect due to the ability to redeem time.

Without wasting much of your time I am Mrs Ala Melkumyan, from Tai Yau Bank Hong Kong I want to bring you into a business venture which I think should be of interest and concern to you, since it has to do with a perceived late family member of yours, this is because there is a substantial amount of funds which I suspect is tied to a distant family member of yours.

However I need to be sure that you must have received this communication so I will not divulge much information about it until i get a response from you.
Kindly respond back to me. on my private email:

Best Regards,
Mrs Ala Melkumyan



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